Today was record breaking. I had an unaccountable spurt of energy (perhaps due to finally getting rid of a recent nasty infection? No idea. Wish I knew so I could make it happen again!) and I used it to keep working on the kitchen. The kitchen is the one room in the house that is left to me to manage. Which means it has been in really sad shape for quite a while. I work on it as much as possible as often as possible, but it has been driving me crazy. For a very long time. This week I finally got some serious work done. With an ineffective dishwasher, aka the very large dish drainer, it takes more time and energy to hand wash everything. But I DID IT! Today I finally got all the counter tops completely cleared all the way to the edges with nothing leftover at all!!! No, I've never been a big fan of cleaning the kitchen, but for a few years things have been consistently decent, until things got really bad for me physically. The last year has been exceptionally difficult. I've even had to give up showering. Okay, I can often half-shower, but cannot even wash my own hair. I can bathe, but still require help even getting in and out of the tub. While it sounds lovely when one has choices, to park in the handicap parking spots, ride the motorized shopping carts, let someone else wash your hair, have someone else fetch and carry everything for you, etc. etc., the reality is not something you'd much enjoy for long, I promise you. Try doing the shopping for the next couple of weeks with only that tiny basket attached to the putt-putt (what we call the motorized carts), where you cannot reach many items, cannot always navigate aisles, and have to either kill yourself (not quite literally) with the pain by walking to just get a couple of items, or turn around and leave when the store has no putt-putts available. Humbling indeed; and sometimes more than a little humiliating. For example, we needed to do shopping at Home Depot and their one putt-putt was dead I had to sit in a wheel chair and let my daughters push me around. As a 34 year old healthy-*looking* individual that is still hard to swallow. Or any of a hundred other things I've learned to not take for granted. Tying shoes? Painting your own toenails? Rolling over in bed? Running upstairs to grab something you forgot? Running "just really quick" anywhere? Sitting for longer than a few minutes on a bad chair? Sitting for longer than an hour or two on a good chair? Weeding the garden? Picking produce from the garden? Opening a jar? Brushing out your own hair? Choosing clothes based on style rather than comfort? etc. etc. Don't get me wrong, I know I am incredibly blessed. I know there are all too many people who live in a situation like mine, or even more difficult, and don't have the support and willing help that I have. The fact that I can decide to sit in the stupid wheelchair and know that my kids and / or husband will push it without complaint makes my life fabulous. The fact that my husband will learn how to wash this huge mass of hair and that my daughters happily paint my toenails every single color imaginable (at the same time, of course!) is amazing. The fact that my doctors trust and believe me and do everything possible to give me every freedom available to me is wonderful. The fact that I have many family members and friends who have put an effort in to understanding my life, accepting when I have to cancel or change plans all too often, and try to be aware of what allowances I may need to be have made for me is incredible. All of which is my way of expression how very excited and proud of myself I am for doing this thing today. It may sound pitiful or gross to you, but I'm thrilled that after months of effort and irritation over this project I have succeeded. I DID IT! It was my own Everest, and it may have taken me months but I won. Yes, I realize that dirty dishes will continue to happen. Let's just not talk about that tonight, 'kay? And please, use a disposable cup ;) via Facebook
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